The Fourth of July every year brings with it many great
traditions: hot dogs, fireworks, partying to excess with friends and family. And
every year I have partied with high school friends in a way that embraces all
of these observances.
My high school friend Steve and his wife Paige put on a
great 4th of July party that brings in friends from far and wide.
Steve is the center of our social circle among most of my Connecticut
friends. When we were in high school, his mother’s house was our central
meeting place, and Mrs. Q was a second mother to a lot of us. She is missed. Steve
and Paige’s house has become a second home to many. They have helped many
friends and relatives who have needed places to stay. Even friends with
perfectly good homes of their own nearby wind up spending a lot of time at
Steve and Paige’s house.
The day of the party, circumstances delayed our departure
until after 2 p.m. Driving on I-95 in Connecticut is its own special hell, and
a Saturday on a holiday weekend it was an infernal misery of traffic. A
two-hour drive became a three-hour drive, and since our kids had already napped
at home, they screamed and cried for much of that three-hour drive. When we
finally pulled onto our friends’ property, it was after 5 p.m.
I didn’t have time to make the stop for fireworks like I
normally do. The forecast called for rain.
Once we got there, it was great to be among friends again.
Steve is a very handy person. He turned his one-story house
into a two-story home and constructed his own out-buildings to keep farm
animals on his property. He got me into hunting, gave me good advice on how to
move about the woods, and helped me field dress my first deer. He also
introduced me to the works of Arthur Schopenhauer and we’ve debated both the immutably
dark nature of human existence until the wee hours of the morning.
Steve and I were both financial journalists for a while. After
being laid off and being without a regular job for a long time, Steve began
working in shipbuilding by helping to renovate the historic Amistad. He has
since began working on boats in Newport, Rhode Island. More than a year ago, he
told me he could not go back to working behind a desk. At the party he said he
hated having to be away from his family for so long for his job, but that he
loves his job. He wakes up every morning and looks forward to going to work. It
was something I had heard about but didn’t think I’d see.
A man who loves his job today is rare. I expected to see
Bigfoot or get kidnapped by a UFO before one of my friends told me they loved
going to work every day. Even though he loves to play the part of a curmudgeon,
he looked sincerely happier than he’s been in the past. It was great to see and
I can’t think of someone who deserves that more than Steve. He brings a lot of
good thoughts and much-needed perspective to a lot of his friends. I know I’ve
been better for having had long conversations with him and I’m far from alone.
He’s been writing a lot of good poetry lately as well and
posting his poems online. He’s getting to see new things, and be inspired by
his work with ships. “In so many ways, sailing is freedom like most of us can’t
even understand.” He messaged me at one point.
A while into our time at the party, I found Steve sitting on
a lawn chair in the back of his pickup truck. With him was our friend Jay. The
two were perfectly content to sit with their beer there and observe the party
from their perch. But they soon began to attract a crowd. Everyone wanted to
stop by and enjoy the conversation. In between searching for and wrangling my
children and stuffing my face with food, I discussed poetry with Steve.
We agreed that two men sitting in the back of a pickup truck
was good fodder for a poem and we decided to each write a poem with this as the
theme.
The party continued and despite my not being able to
contribute to the supply of ordnance, there were still plenty of fireworks. My
twin girls asked to be brought inside and skip the rest of the barrage after
getting a bit too close to the pyrotechnics. Inside Jay was making his
outstanding jambalaya, and we got a peek at the culinary genius at work.
We stayed late and got on the road for home after 11:30 p.m.
Someday we’ll stay overnight in a tent on our friends’ lawn like my wife and I
did before we had children.
\It was a great way to celebrate Independence Day. The national
politics evolves and devolves, and no matter your perspective, it’s easy to
become discouraged. The strength of our country lies in the bonds we form with
friends and neighbors, and at Steve and Paige’s house, a strong community
thrives on its own.
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